We were headed to church this morning. I was sitting in the passenger seat; my husband was driving. I looked in the back seat at my youngest daughter. She was staring out the window talking about the fields, the birds, other cars… pretty much anything and everything that caught her eye.
She had this look on her face. A mix of wonderment and contentment and peace. It was one of the most beautiful things I’d ever laid eyes on.
Then, I had the strongest sense that while I was watching her, God was watching me. The only difference was I was smiling while I was watching Eva. But God was not smiling while He was watching me.
Let me explain.
You see, just minutes before that, I was a million miles away from that van. I was thinking about things I had to do later, and things that happened earlier. I was thinking about everything out in the world, but nothing in that van.
Eva, on the other hand, wasn’t at all concerned about anything other than what was right in front of her in that moment. She wasn’t fretting over where we were going, or how we would get there. She wasn’t worried about gas, traffic, construction, anything. She didn’t need to.
She trusted that her daddy knew the way, had put gas in the tank, and could maneuver traffic, and yes, construction, too. All she had to do was sit back, trust, and enjoy the ride.
And that’s why watching her was so beautiful.
God wasn’t smiling while He watched me, though, because I wasn’t like Eva. I was fretting, stressing, planning, sulking. If I’m being honest, I wasn’t trusting that my Heavenly Father knew the way, provided the means, and could maneuver the twists and turns of my life. And, because if it, I was missing the beauty of the moment right in front of me.
God wasn’t smiling because I wasn’t smiling. He wants me to sit back, trust him, appreciate the blessings around me, and just enjoy the ride. He does not want me to worry about all the things I can’t control, like where this road leads and what detours might be up ahead.
I watched Eva for a little while longer and then snapped a quick picture of her… to remind myself to be more present, watchful, appreciative. Today I’m praying for a spirit of wonderment and contentment. I’m praying to be more childlike on this journey, to be able to just sit back enjoy the ride.